Embarking on a Journey of Self-Discovery

“In the social jungle of human existence, there is no feeling of being alive without a sense of identity.” -Erik Erikson

Psychoanalyst Erik Erikson developed a theory called psychosocial development, which proposes that through a lifespan an individual goes through a series of eight stages. At each stage, a crisis must be resolved. An individual’s response to these crises can either provide a blow to one’s personality or a boost to one’s personality.

Stage five, identity versus role confusion begins in adolescence (~13yo) and lasts to young adult (~22yo). At this stage, the question that needs to be answered is: “Who am I?” The teenager begins a process of self-exploration and self-discovery. This transitionary phase, consisting of tests and trials, can create some confusion, can create some uncertainty, and is a time where adolescents may begin to push some boundaries. They are being pulled in all kinds of directions—being influenced by community, culture, peers, media, and inadvertently, to some extent, politics, etc. The goal is to emerge from this chaos with a strong sense of self.

Because it can be chaotic, parents and caregivers can play a support role by laying a strong foundation that provides some stabilization. This looks like ongoing guidance, structure, consistency, rules, boundaries, standards for behavior, etc. In providing this you are helping to create a sense of security and predictability. It is also a time to encourage the teen to engage in different activities and explore hobbies and talents in effort to help them develop healthy, well-rounded identity, while at the same time creating a greater self-relationship in which a sense of belonging is recognized.

Due to the current state of our society and the limitations of school structure, teenagers are rarely offered the opportunity to delve into self-discovery. Instead, schools create “Safe Zones” that quickly push labels on these impressionable minds. These “Safe Zones” eliminate any real exploration of identity, instead pulling them away from their true self and leaving a residue of insecurity and shame that creates an unhealthy personality. Further, it denies them the opportunity to validate their experience and their emotions. This them robs them of understanding the connection between needs and emotions and the confidence for self-expression or the ability to identify and process through emotions in a way that allows them to master emotions and grow socially.

It is for this purpose that I am facilitating a group for teenagers, age 15yo-17yo, called “The Path of Self-Discovery”. This group will be held on the third Wednesday of every month, with a tentative start date of November 15, at 4:00pm. Charge: $65.00.